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jamesbeth

 my plan to take pictures EVERY DAY of this summer has failed. bombed. finitoo.
because i've had some boring days. these definetely need to change. i'm tired of sitting at home, having my mom tell me to get active. uhh i would if you know, i actually had some PLANS.
but i guess its my fault as well.

i have to call subway at 9:00 to find out if i got the job.
god, stressed much?

i had a panic attack tonight.
can you believe i actually get those? it's insane. i remember one time in school, we had this huge english castle project due and becka&morgan played a little PRANK on me, telling me they left it at home. yeah. i had a panic attack. couldn't breathe, for what seemed like five hours and i kept wheezing. i felt a little stupid afterwards, when they told me they were just joking.
but i can't believe i get freaking panic attacks.

i'm learning a lot about me this summer.
like, i used to think i was weak. that i let people walk all over me.
but this year? no. i've stood up. i've fought. and for once, i felt like i was strong. like i could handle things.
maybe not all my goals are being accomplished....but i am finding myself.

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